Question:
I feel inspired to enter the monastic life, but I also have my mother who depends on me. I tried arranging support for her, yet I feel uncertain because others may not care for her with the same compassion that I can. My heart is torn between my aspiration for the monastic path and my duty to care for my mother. What should I do?
Answer:
This is a very noble dilemma. The wish to dedicate one’s life to the monastic path is deeply admirable, and at the same time, caring for one’s parents is among the highest blessings praised by the Buddha (maṅgala). Looking after parents with gratitude, patience, and compassion is itself a profound spiritual practice.
Sometimes, the conditions in life may not yet fully support ordination. In such cases, we can see the responsibility of caring for loved ones as part of the training itself. Serving one’s mother with kindness cultivates the same qualities—patience, renunciation, compassion, and letting go—that are essential for the monastic life.
It is not necessary to see this as a choice of one path over another. Instead, view your present responsibilities as a continuation of your Dhamma practice. Continue meditating, practicing loving-kindness, and dedicating merit to your mother. In time, when the conditions become more supportive, the path to ordination will naturally open.
Whatever decision is made—whether remaining as a lay practitioner while caring for one’s mother, or later entering the monastic life—both are noble when rooted in Dhamma and compassion.
